Seven life lessons from the Olympics

Posted on 12/08/2012 by inktuition

It’s the last day of London 2012. For two weeks I’ve been running (dashing to the nearest TV screen to see the latest race), jumping (for joy and with frustration as I will Team GB to win) and screaming (at the TV, because surely that helps our athletes to win!)

Being in London has swept me along with the excitement of it all. There’s a buzz in the air, a purpose in our day, and pride in our hearts. I think I’ll feel bereft once it’s all over – and I’ll be holding my breath until the Paralympics start in a couple of weeks’ time.

The Olympics are truly inspiring a generation. (pic: istockphoto.com/jokerproproduction)

As I reflect on two phenomenal weeks of athleticism, determination and sheer brilliance, here are seven life lessons the Olympics have taught me: Continue reading →

A poem about a miscarriage

Posted on 09/08/2012 by inktuition

My heart went out to Gary Barlow and his wife Dawn when I heard how their baby Poppy had been stillborn. In my work as a therapist with women who have lost babies to miscarriage and stillbirth, I know there are intense feelings of loss around what might have been – the dreams that have been so cruelly taken away – mixed with intense gratitude for the blessings they do have.

A friend of mine recently miscarried her baby. She is a young, healthy woman, who already has a child, so she is baffled why she miscarried. She said: “When I heard about women who had miscarried, I used to think of it as matter of fact. But now experiencing it myself, it is a whole different world. It’s almost like I now belong to a club, where there are so many of us but no-one talks about it and women suffer in silence. Now I think: was there a spirit? Where has it gone? What was God’s reason to take my child away from me?”

I wish I had an answer. The way I chose to respond to her pain was in creative writing, via a poem:

To the twinkle that blinked Continue reading →

The two decisions I made that helped me finish my novel

Posted on 12/06/2012 by inktuition

Like many writers, I’d been working on a novel for years. The idea for it came into my head, skittered across the page for a while, then exited stage right. I dragged it back on to perform, reluctantly, for many years – and each time it looked more awkward than before, and with increasingly palpable and self-destructive stage fright.

I so wished I had allowed the creative novel-writing impetus more time and space in my life while it was fresh and energetic, rather than cowed and defeated. Six years on – and already six months into the grace period of my extended Creative Writing MA deadline, with very little developmental or restorative work on my manuscript – I was considering asking for another extension.

Except that this time Continue reading →

Writing Optimism: capture your compliments (and your critiques) in a treasure box

Posted on 10/06/2012 by inktuition

Capture your happy, sad and confused feelings in writing. (pic: istockphoto.com/solvod)

Feeling down about your output? Fed up about rejections? Feel you’ll never make it as a writer? We’ve all been there – and yet we all still keep going. Or do we?

If you’re thinking about crumpling up your last piece of paper in the bin and hanging up your ink pen for good, think again. Instead, pick a nice jar (clean and tall) or – if you’re like me – use this as an excuse to go to a stationery store and buy a nice new treasure box (patterned, plain or whatever shape, size or cost inspires you). Any excuse.

The purpose of the treasure box is to hold all the positive comments you get – whether that’s about your writing, your expressions, a great turn of phrase, or even how you’re looking today. The point is: you write them all down, fold them up, and deposit them in your treasure box/jar. So, when you’re having a bad day, or feel you’ve reached a dead end, you simply dip into the folded up pieces of paper in your magic jar, and hey presto, you’re reminded of how good you can be.

For those of you who feel that undaunted optimism is too much too soon – or rather unrealistic – let’s not forget the shadow of optimism: pessimism. Criticism – and all the negativity that goes with it – can be Continue reading →

I’ve started so I’ll finish…? Why ‘mastery’ is about ending, not just beginning

Posted on 09/06/2012 by inktuition

I attended a workshop on mastery recently, where the key topic was on not just having ideas (which, if my notebook is anything to go by, is full of beginnings but not very many endings) but on seeing them through to the end.

Endings mean the … erm… end of something, which can bring up feelings of being bereft. So why not cling on to your project so you don’t have to encounter the emptiness you’d feel if your project were finally over … as if you didn’t have anything to work for any more.

Another view is that, to achieve anything, you need Continue reading →

Ladies: write your worries down in a journal, says anxiety study

Posted on 08/06/2012 by inktuition

Journalling can help alleviate workplace worries for women. (pic: istockphoto.com/AlinaMD)

If you’re a writer, you’re probably going to turn to pen and paper (preferably pristine new ones) when you’re going through a crisis (emotional, professional, romantic or otherwise). Who hasn’t trundled off to Paperchase or WHSmith in the search of some literary alleviation of stress, upset or trauma?

Well, apparently the thing that all writers know – Continue reading →

why I chose a bashed notebook over a pristine one

Posted on 11/05/2012 by inktuition

Oh, how many lovely new pristine notebooks do I have in my drawers, on my shelves, and lined up proudly on my desk.

A self-confessed notebook addict, I’m unable to pass a stationery store without a little peak at the perky new notebooks that could steal my attention, part me with my pounds, and then remain awesome but abandoned on my desk.

I got a posh notebook as a present for Christmas a couple of years ago – complete with inscription from the gifter – and somehow I’ve never felt worthy of using it. There has never been an occasion when I thought this book would be suitable. So it sits, in its shiny-clothed isolation – like a posh dress waiting for a gold-rimmed invitation – not being used, loved or creative.

An already damaged notebook has more chance of encouraging my creative writing.

It was in the want, rather than need, of a new journal, that I passed by the lovely Paperchase and happened to spot the perfect notebook for me. Twice the price of what I would usually pay, but leather bound and worth it. The lines are closer together – I dislike those fat-lined notebooks, as they need so few words to fill a page, and I feel my thoughts need lines that are narrower and somehow more intimate. The leather is already damaged, as though someone had bent over the corner on the front and pressed a hairbrush to the back. The paper inside is yellowing, and perfect for use with a fountain pen.

My new purchase was not perfect. I checked out all three purple leather journals in the shop to see which one fitted me best. All three smelt of that ‘old’ leather that you get in second-hand shops. The book I chose felt wise: its pattern was innate, it had been around the block a few times, and it was comfortable with its lines, its bends, and its creases.

This felt like Continue reading →

Why World Book Day is for life, not just for one day

Posted on 01/03/2012 by inktuition

Are your books for life, or just for one day? (image is a screen grab from http://www.worldbookday.com)

My eight-year-old daughter begs me for a story every night. It’s a treat for her to be read to – especially if I agree to read the books of her babyhood, but perhaps changing the voice, the tense, the direction and even the names of the character to spice it up a bit.

I’ve been reading to her – not always out loud, sometimes in my head – since she was first conceived. It never entered my mind that a child of mine wouldn’t want to hear stories read to her, and for her imagination to be fired.

I hadn’t planned any particular learning outcome from sharing my passion for stories with my little girl, but as it turns out she always gets Continue reading →

On Leap Year Day, surely there’s no excuse for not making that writing leap?

Posted on 29/02/2012 by inktuition

Leap Year Day feels special. Obviously, because it comes around once every four years. But less obviously, because I’ve decided to make THAT leap with my writing and do something brave.

Will making that leap leave me gasping for air – or feeling exhilarated? (pic credit: istockphoto.com/mikdam)

I guess what’s brave for one could be rather safe and ordinary for another. But I was inspired and encouraged by the comments my post ‘why can’t I come out of my writing shell?‘ prompted – especially from the wonderful Fiercely Yours – that I am going to take the plunge and leave my nagging inner critic trailing in the wake of my new-found, authentically driven creativity.

Instead of strangling every thought, every Continue reading →

Why can’t I come out of my writing shell?

Posted on 28/02/2012 by inktuition

How can I crack open my shell to reveal the pearls within? (pic credit: istockphoto.com/Kasiam)

Ask any writer – a real writer – why he or she writes, and they’ll reply that they’re born to do it. It’s their destiny, and it’s a dream that they’re not prepared to let go.

I’m one of them, but I’ll only admit to that in writerly circles. While I make a living from writing – from journalism, commercial writing and copywriting – I’m kind of shy about the fact that I harbour ambitions to be an author. Of a novel. Preferably in print, displayed prominently in the front window of Continue reading →

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